DISCLAIMER - In no way shape or form am I saying condoms are bad. They are one of the best prevention techniques for pregnancy and std's. Condoms as a category are an awesome thing that my life would surely suxors without.

Latex condoms. Wonderful devices that I highly promote the use of, but I also secretly hate. I love the wonderful pregnancy and std protection they provide, and my only complaints are aesthetic in nature. The smell, taste and feel are all kind of disgusting to me, but I most certainly would never disregard using one, even though I'm on my birth control again. So I set out in search of a condom that doesn't have the other icky qualities, and at the pharmacy counter of my local Rainbow(food library grocery store) i found these. Thought what the fuck, let's give it a try as both my partner (formerly HGAW) and I are STD free. Fucking sweet i tell you. A little different as they are made of natural membrane, so there is no resevior tip (remember to leave some space for the spermies gentlemen) but they don't leave any smells and it feels fucking great! He agreed enthusiastically when I asked if we should keep purchasing them, so we went to Rainbow to pick up more and...they were out. So we went to Walgreens, where the same condoms which cost 6.99/12 at rainbow cost 39.99/12.
w..t...f..
Everywhere else I have looked they are at least 2-3 times the price of latex condoms, so needless to say, I'm fucking going to Rainbow for all my condom needs.

How did I go from getting a significant refund last year (which I SORELY needed, it was how I kept my shitbox car running godamnit!) to owing them money? I didn't change my filing status, I made probably LESS than I did last year but according to the dry run (I have to work my way up to actual completion) of doing my taxes I owe the federal government about 400-500 bucks. I have never owed money before, I'm fucking 21, have no assets to speak of and make BARELY enough money to live on. Shit I made maybe 18,000 this year, MAYBE!! Actually when I looked at it, me and my roomates will all owe money, my boyfriend who made 16,000 this year, apparently owes like 600 dollars.

Thats real fucking good.

I'm wondering if Bri will be owing them an even 1000 because shit, she made probably about 7000. Obviously since she didn't make very much, she doesn't really need any of it.
So either the federal government has decided to openly fuck the poor in the ass with the largest dildo I've ever seen, or how you do taxes has fucking changed drastically.

Of course I could always have made a mistake....please let me have made a mistake....otherwise....

I am so fucked.

UPDATE:
K so I'm not that fucked. I just fucked up, totally forgot one of the essential steps of doing taxes. I was saddened at my own stupidity for a moment, then I decided to never again attempt taxes while slightly intoxicated. BAD idea. Stop laughing damnit!

This is fucking absurd, but I don't think they have enough vulgar and detracting statements out there to describe the blatent  stupidity that this is.
Did you know that the earth revolves around the sun? Along with all other 9 8 planets and .

I know, fucking revolutionary right? I totally didn't steal the idea from this guy. Nope. Not at all.

Sigh. Seriously people, it's been 493 fucking years since this theory was published. Almost 5 fucking centuries! We have been to SPACE for fuck's sake, how do you think we did that? This isn't an idle guess they decided to just go with, there was research - centuries of it! - and . . . they are totally not listening. Fuck.
This is why we don't allow unintelligent design in to the classroom. These people don't even know what the fuck a scientific theory is, so they aren't shouldn't be allowed to spout ricockulous bullshit and call it science. Sometimes I swear, these people will look at something and if it's too complicated for them to understand, or it doesn't fit into their nice little box, then they assume it must be false. I suppose it's hard to have the idea that we are tiny insignificant little animals that developed through millions of years of trial and error shoved in your face with all it's "evidence", when you've been thinking you're the sky daddy's super special little buddy, created in his very own image and sent here to do his bidding. The truth is a disillusioning bitch huh?
Hat tip

It's wonderful to discover that one of the men your father revere's make's such well-thought out statements as

"In "A Christian Manifesto," he warned against wrapping Christianity in the American flag, but added, "None of this, however, changes the fact that the United States was founded upon a Christian consensus, nor that we today should bring Judeo-Christian principles into play in regard to government." Schaeffer was one of the first evangelical leaders to get deeply involved in the fight against abortion, and he advocated civil disobedience and the possible use of force to stop it. "It is time we consciously realize that when any office commands what is contrary to God's Law it abrogates its authority," he wrote."

Just....fuck. I hoped and hoped that my dad might be a little more realistic then my mother about political things. Like understanding that freedom of religion means freedom of ANY religion, not just the freedom to practice some bland flavor of X-tianity.

Other great points from these people include:

"Charles Colson accepts one hundred people annually into his yearlong "worldview training" courses, which include meetings in Washington, D.C., online seminars, "mentoring," and several hours of homework each week. "The program will be heavily weighted towards how to think," Colson's Web site says. It's intended for those who work in churches, media, law, government, and education, and who can thus teach others to think the same way."

And here I thought I knew how to think! Guess not, or maybe I just don't kow how to think the 'right' (ha ha terrible pun) way. Seems as if the course is intended to brainwash help you learn to think the godly way. For instance apparently these people know god's opinions on everything!

"The documents outline a complete political program, with a "biblically correct" position on issues like taxes (God favors a flat rate), public schools (generally frowned upon), and the media and the arts ("We deny that any pornography and other blasphemy are permissible as art or 'free speech'")."

But isn't speaking for god kind of blasphemous? Guess it's okay if it's done for furthering the interests of the religious right.

Another gem statement here;

"Only Christianity offers a comprehensive worldview that covers all areas of life and thought, every aspect of creation. Only Christianity offers a way to live in response to the realities that we find in this world. Only Christianity."

Please explain these
70,000 Year old Human Rituals
Mini Solar System Could Reveal Hidden Dimensions

I'm sure they would probably have issue's with these people seeing as how I doubt they think in the pre-approved way. Especially considering they probably follow (Le GASP!) Evolution! The theory that's full of holes (says the sieve to the bucket ).

Are you between the ages of 19-29 and aren't married? Well then the government is here to let you know they've got a plan for you! No sex (unless your married of course)! Eh?....Eh, eh? Not gonna go for it are you? Not with such wonderful convincing statements like these?

"For condoms to be used correctly, over 10 specific difficult steps must be followed every time. This tends to minimize the romance and spontaneity of the sex act. (Choosing the Best, p. 25)."

10 steps? Really? Let's see here, I'm gonna try to break it down as much as possible
How to use a condom
1) Open little foil package
2) Remove condom
3) Throw foil package and little torn off bit to the side
4) Figure out which is the topside
5) Roll down over erect penis
6) ENJOY!!
So the most we got was 6...and none of them could be categorized as difficult, trying maybe (ever have an issue with getting it open? Yeah me too) but not exactly difficult. And then of course there are these kick ass condoms, which I am hoping catch on here as they are currently only available in Africa (i think anyway).

"Women need affection while men need sexual fulfillment; women need conversation while men need recreation companionship; women need honest and openness while men need physical attractiveness; women need financial support while men need admiration, and women need family commitment while men need domestic support" (WAIT Training, p. 199).

Where to start? How about the fact that this is educational materials with some pretty amazing grammar, 'recreation companionship'? 'women need honest'? Great proofreading skills on whoever designed that material. Every statement is a broad, misogynistic generalization of both men and women that  equates us with television stereotypes. Women don't want sex only love, have an inherent NEED to talk and require ca$h and babies, STAT! Men just want sex, an active buddy who also happens to be totally HAWT and tells him how manly and super amazing he is while doing his laundry. Good to know.  Please remember this isn't some fundie pamphlet either, these are actual materials they are using to teach abstinence-only ed in schools and now apparently to us slutty 20-somethings.
Now we come to the all important question of why? Why do we need to be teaching abstinence to a group that over 90% has had sex before, likely more than once!

"Government data released last month show that 998,262 births in 2004 were to unmarried women 19-29, the ages with the most births to unmarried women."

Unplanned pregnancy, (which they mean as anyone who has a baby and isn't married). According to the government, if you are an unmarried person under 29 the best way to prevent pregnancy is abstinence. Which is true, just not realistic. Do we really need to be telling adults lies to intimidate them into not having sex? Because I don't think that will work. Does our government really need to be in on our sex lives anyway? Now for the real kicker, because really we all knew how the BushCo government felt about fucking (if you're anything other than a married strictly heterosexual couple), they will be spreading this misinformation with $50 million.
I know, I'm excited too.
Hat tip to Mark Morford and Travels with Floyd as well as Feministe for the great video

There's just something about all those fucking carols, garish decorations and people spouting "merry christmas" out of one side of their mouth then getting all pissed off you don't have that THING they want that inspires a special kind of rage in me.  At my retail job when the manager is there, we are required to listen to the local radio station that plays 24/7 x-mas tunes during the holidays. This understandable makes me want to stab people in the face, usually when we get to the third time in as many hours of one of Bruce Springsteen's x-mas covers, or perhaps it's the 50th time of hearing Jingle Bell Rocks that inspires me to become stabby. It's hard to tell at this point.
I used to love x-mas as a kid (who doesn't?) now I dread this time of year.

Sigh

Only 25 days left till this fucking "holiday" is over.

I know, I know what can I expect, it's men'shealth.com but jeebuz

Can't Tell the Players Without a Scorecard
"So much subliminal information is conveyed in those first seconds of contact," says Carol Kauffman, Ph.D., a relationship therapist and psychology instructor at Harvard medical school. Okay, so you're on the clock. Make every second count. Below are 10 ways - in rough chronological order - a woman judges your fitness to be her proverbial daddy.

The first statement, quite true, the eye contact, body language, tone of voice, not to mention what is said initially effect every relationship. I thought this was true for both sexes and pretty much everyone in general (it's certainly how my cat's interact anyway). Apparently only women take this information into affect and it's only so they can find someone to replace their father! Excellent, I'm, excited now I know how to date like a real woman! Do i really need to mention the creepy overtones of that statement or trying to lend credibility to their statements by using a quick-quote from a doctor? Okay good.

Can He Talk About Himself and Listen to Me?

She'll carry 80 percent of the conversation load. Just make sure your 20 percent is about something.

Nice straw-woman. Very nice.

Does He Have the Potential to be a Good Father?

"For long-term potential, she considers whether you have the values she wants in a man," says Jean Koehler, Ph.D., president of the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors, and Therapists. If she can't see tykes on your knee, she's wasting her time. How you interact with your own family can be a strong indicator here.

I believe this was the one that inspired rage. It's not outlandish to say they may look at certain things you do for possible long term relationship sometimes, but the automatic assumption that all women everywhere (or at least straight women as we shall presume that a periodical such as Men's Health is not catering to lesbians) are looking for a man to inseminate them, well I feel insulted how about you ladies? I know I enjoy being told I am nothing but a baby hungry relationship seeker.

Time to stumble off in a slightly drunk rage to bed.
Read the rest, it's um, pleasant

If I lose her because of him I will NEVER forgive him. Ever.

I was driving along Snelling Ave in Roseville about to get on Highway 36 to go home from dropping Shukun off. The car jerks as I make a turn (kind of like if you skip a gear when driving a manuel) and when I stop at the light it dies. Shuts down and refuses to start back up. On Snelling Ave. At 7:40 PM. To put it shortly I'm surprised no one rear ended me out of pure rage. I called Shukun and he and Teh Ogre came and pushed my car into a parking lot. I went back to try to start it yesterday and after a little coaxing it started. So now it's sitting at the electric shop and I'm waiting to hear what is to be done with it. I'm hoping it's not too epensive.